Part II – Si BFD. Walang Malisya. (not another Derek Ramsey movie)

Paunawa

Kailangan mailathala ang Part II upang mabisa nating maitawid ang kwento sa Part III.  Paunawa sa mga babasa, napaka-wholesome po ito na kwento, walang bahid dungis o pagkahumaling (whew!), kaya isantabi nyo po muna ang alam nyo na (wag madumi isip)  Je je je   =)

Part II – Si BFD.  Walang Malisya.  (not another Derek Ramsey movie)

…nakilala ko ang isang runner / blogger na may initial na BFD (parang blind item lang dapat sa una)…at parang wala lang syempre noon.  Chill.  Deadma.  Ni hindi man lang pumasok sa isip ko na palitan ang aking major crush na si…Derek Ramsey!!!

Actor Derek Ramsey – sya na!!!
Photo credit: No Other Woman – Star Cinema

Dumating ang pagkakataon na naghanap ako ng ibang sports maliban sa badminton…napunta ako sa running. Nagsimula ako sa 5KM hanggang sa umakyat ng 21KM…at hindi ko din akalain kakayanin kong tapusin ang 42.195KM last year.  Naging sobrang addict ako sa life.  Sa level ng energy na meron ako, parang wala ng bukas.  Badminton 2x a week, running 3x a week…at syempre andyan ang aking trabaho na kailangan din seryosohin dahil mahirap kumita ng pera; lalo na isip ang puhunan ko sa trabaho, hindi katawan (kung pwede lang sultry actress ala-Anne Curtis).

February 2011 – Naghahanap ako ng resources noon sa internet tungkol sa running hanggang sa mapadpad ako sa isang website – http://www.barefootdaves.com  Ang website na ito ay aking sinundan (‘follow’ ang term dito sa web, hindi po ako stalker) para updated din naman ako sa running.  Madali makilala ang owner ng website na ito sa mga road race ‘pag Sunday.  Ang haba kasi ng hair ni Barefootdaves (BFD)…lalaki sya, okay!  =)

Minsan na ako nagtanong kay BFD sa website nya.  Hindi naman sya suplado, pati sa Facebook friendly naman .  Ilang buwan ko sya naka-chat pero bihirang-bihirang-bihira at tungkol lang lahat sa running….SOBRANG WALA LANG.  WALANG MALISYA!  Hindi ako defensive…pero kay BFD ata baka may malisya.  Tanungin nyo na lang sya.

Sa RU3, November 2011, 32km category – mula Buendia palabas ng Roxas Blvd may maingay na nag-uusap sa tabi ko…medyo annoying nga eh.  So tumingin ako sa left, pati na rin sa right, at nakita ko si ‘long-hair’, este BFD na naka Team Alpha 1 singlet!  Aaminin ko sa world wide web sa pagkakataon na ito na somehow, ‘starstruck’ ako sa presence ni BFD (slight lang ha)…pero walang malisya, isa nga kasi ako follower ng kanyang blog (pwede mag-explain).  Sa ilang pagkakataon na magkatabi kami sa kalsada, naisipan ko mag ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ pero hindi nya ko napapansin, ni hindi man lang sya tumingin sa ‘kin…kaya nasabi ko na lang kay Jay (SM Runners) – “kasabay pala natin si Barefootdaves.”

Tumingin ako sa left, pati na rin sa right…si BFD!
PEG: Nakita ko lang. Hindi ko crush. Walang malisya.

Nagsimula din ako mag-blog last year para magkaron ng online backup ng ilang mga alaala, resilient na ang web compared sa Alzheimer’s kaya mabuti na din na may online backup.  At sa isang post ko noon November 2011, nagulat na lang ako nang may magpost ng comment …walang iba kundi si…hindi si Derek (ayyyyy)…kundi si BFD!!!  Wala pa itong malisya.  As in, chill lang kami pareho.  Flattered lang ako sa idea na isang kilalang runner-blogger si BFD, na para bang ang trivial ng blog ko sa runner na katulad nya pero heto sya at nag comment pa!

At dahil sa mga pag-comment na yan sa blog, naniniwala na ako ngayon sa sinabi ni ADD ng SM Runners…”para-paraan lang yan!”  Wink, wink….

At kung sa paanong paraan, itutuloy natin mula sa Mundo ng Running patungo sa mga Keso sa Part III….  =)

Part I – Single, Happy, Sexy and I Know It (not another John Lloyd movie)

Paunawa

Ang akdang ito ay nakalimbag sa wikang Tagalog.  Sa mga hindi sanay, ang matagalan pagbabasa ng mga ganitong akda ay maaring magdulot ng pagdurugo ng ilong (nose bleed).  Basahin lamang kung iyong kakayanin.

Sa mga taong tumatangkilik ng mga pelikula ni John Lloyd sa Star Cinema, akin lamang pinapakiusap na huwag ihalintulad ang post na ito sa kanyang mga pelikula.  Moment ko ‘to!  So please sit back and relax!

Halimbawa lang ng isang John Lloyd Movie (Star Cinema and Viva Films)
Year 2009

Part I – Single, Happy, Sexy and I Know It

Sa pagkakilala ng mga taong naka-trabaho ko na, ako ay may kakayahang magpalit ng anyo – from tweetums to dragon lady sa ilang segundo lamang.  Pinangingilagan ako ng mga taong hindi alam ang ginagawa nila dahil sinasabi ko ang mga bagay na kailangan kahit ayaw nila marinig…in my most kontrabida tone, “Because I can. (eyes roll)”.  Hindi naman ako lumalabag sa karapatang pantao, ngunit ganun pa man, ‘intimidating’ pa din ang aura ko…kaya siguro hanggang ‘dating’ lang ako dati, hindi umaabot sa ‘in a relationship.”  (Yun oh!)

AVP = Assigned to Various Positions, Assigned to Various Projects
PEG : BUSY AKO!!!

May ilang eksena din naman na sinasabi ng ilan na nasa akin na siguro lahat maliban sa true love (well, ako na!!!)…hindi ko ito tiningnan na kakulangan…ang katwiran ko kaya nga may bokasyon na ‘single blessedness’ para sa mga taong katulad ko na may bracket na papasukan – kung may aliping namamahay at aliping sagigilid nga, di ba???  Think, Araling Panlipunan 101.

Hindi naman siguro ako si Bitter Ocampo para sabihin na hindi din lahat ng ‘in a relationship / in an open relationship / engaged / married’ ay totoong masaya…eh di sana, totoo ang mga katagang ‘…and they live happily ever after…”

Hindi din naman po ako ang proverbial Iron Lady.  Si Madam Margaret Thatcher yon, hindi si Meowth (ehem, ehem).  Meron din ako mga eksena na masaya sa una, pero bad break up sa bandang huli (mga tipo ng it’s-not-you-it’s-me). Yun ang mga panahong nilunod ko din ang sarili ko sa alak at pagnagmamaneho ako pauwi ay para bang All By Myself ni Celine Dion at Alone ng Heart ang mga awitin ng aking buhay. Sob-fest!  Ang mga bagay naman na ito ay nabanggit lang ngayon, at ganap ko na nalampasan ng bonggang-bongga!

Madami pang masayang mga bagay na pwedeng gawin sa buhay.  I did just that.  Nagpakasaya ako sa buhay, pati pag reach out sa mga anik-anik na bagay, ginawa ko din at nag-uumapaw naman ang puso ko sa saya.  Ilang beses ko din nasabi sa sarili ko na kaya pala ‘single blessedness’ ang tawag dito, with matching smile in my heart ito.

PEG: I work hard. I play harder.

Single, happy, (at blog ko ‘to) sexy and I know it.  San ka pa?

Habang nadadagdagan ang aking edad, nababawasan din ang investment ko sa dating/getting-to-know yada, yada/potential relationship.  Mas gusto ko pa mag-invest at mag-ipon para sa retirement ko para naman may pambayad ako sa nurse na mag-aalaga sa akin…realistic lang naman ako.  As if wala na ata talagang true love sa panahon na ito; peaceful co-existence, pwede pa.  Yan na halos ang dumikit sa utak ko na parang sticky note hanggang sa…  =)

Max Ehrmann’s ‘Desiderata’

About the poem:    Desiderata (Latin: desired things), a prose poem written by American author Max Ehrmann in 1927.  Copies in poster form started to circulate in the mid-60s.  In 1967, the prose went mainstream as recited by artist Leonard Nimoy, calling it “Spock Thoughts”.  – Wikipedia.org

What it means to me:  This poem is a gem! A theater director handed me a copy of Desiderata twenty years ago; she even asked me to memorize it.  The poem turned out to be ‘a gift’.  A couple of months ago, for the first time in N years, I had to dig it out of a virtual treasure chest —  while I was ‘soul-searching’…for there are moments that warrant the need to read something in order for us to cope – for us to be reminded of things which we already know…  I find it difficult at this moment to paint a vivid picture of how it was to go on a soul-searching mode nearing mid-life. Whew! Over it! =)

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Marie Antoinette’s Estate – Versailles, France
Photo by: C. Dirampaten

Go placidly amidst the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. 

As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexatious to the spirit. 

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.  Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in  the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery.  But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.  Especially, do not feign affection.  Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.  Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.  But do not
distress yourself with dark imaginings.  Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.  You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the starts; you have the right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.  Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. 

With all its shams, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. 

Be cheerful.  Strive to be happy.

Blooms – Riksjmuseum, Amsterdam
Photo by: C. Dirampaten

Notes on Introspection

Introspection (or internal perception) is the self-examination of one’s conscious thoughts and feelings. In psychology, the process of introspection relies exclusively on the purposeful and rational self-observation of one’s mental state; however, introspection is sometimes referenced in a spiritual context as the examination of one’s soul.  Introspection is closely related the philosophical concept of human self-reflection, and is contrasted with external observation. – Wikipedia

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Clueless?
Photo by: A. Sales

I used to be so excited about the Year of the Dragon, but after facing the first quarter storm, I was under the impression that 2012 would be a lackluster year…I was wrong.  Change of perspective or luck?  =)

“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck. ” – Dalai Lama XIV

“If you can cultivate the right attitude, your enemies are your best spiritual teachers, because their presence provide you with the opportunity to enhance and develop tolerance, patience, and understanding.” – Dalai Lama XIV

I’m not as feisty as I was in my 20s.  The years have probably mellowed me.  Since last year, I found myself in deep introspection in several occasions.  It wasn’t about entering a depressive state, but rather thinking about lifelong happiness and fulfillment…a selfless pursuit in putting more meaning to life.  Time to shut the noise – those unwanted signals which blocked the flow of positive energy. Once again, the vibrant energy has begun to transcend across multiple facets of life, including interpersonal dealings.

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes everyday.  This is a power you can cultivate.  If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind.  That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.” – Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love

Quo vadis? – Sentosa, SG
Photo by: C. Dirampaten

“When life becomes too complicated, overwhelming, or confusing, it’s useful to stand back and remind ourselves of our overall purpose or goal.  Take an hour, an afternoon, or even several days to reflect on what it is that will truly bring us happiness, and then reset our priorities based on that.  This can put our life back in proper context, allow a fresh perspective, and enable us to see what directions to take…The turning toward happiness as a valid goal and the conscious decision to systematically seek it can profoundly change the rest of our lives. ” – His Holiness The Dalai Lama and Howard C. Cutler, M.D.,  The Essence of Happiness, 2010.

“The more you are motivated by love, the more fearless and free your action will be.” – Dalai Lama XIV

Sunset – Boracay Island, Philippines
Photo: A. Sales

Now I’m Writing About Love…

In night’s deep silence

I uttered a prayer of pure intentions

He spoke to me again of love

In a voice so clear to my conscience

Demise was an imagination

Love is not a promise lost.

 

I woke up the next morning

I humbly thanked Him

For bringing me to the present

It was the beginning of a new journey 

Guided by both heart and mind

I picked up the pace.

 

Spirits so calm

Minds of strong resolve

Hearts full of joy

Giving and accepting

True love and friendship

Forever to cherish and keep.

 

Not just about a bunch of brain chemicals… =)

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Who says I can’t write about love?  Now, at least, I’m trying…and I never thought that I could write or talk about love in my 30s, the way I did when I was 16.  =)

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“The greater the level of calmness of our mind, the greater our peace of mind, the greater our ability to enjoy a happy and joyful life.”  – Dalai Lama