Narrative by a not-so-drunken woman

Beautiful Friday night and my eyes were smiling as I skimmed the liquor list of Astoria.  I was giddy as a teenager, so excited to order her first shot.  Oh, how I wish I was in Vicar St., Dublin, Ireland(think, the Script).  Instead, I was in a place somewhere between the heavens and the deep blue sea…in a paradise known to many as Boracay.

A friend once told me about Boracay as the best place to get drunk.  I could not wait to get into the plane, off to the island to get myself a good alcohol fix.  No need to drive home for the one of the hippest bars at Station 1 is located at Astoria’s beach front (yes!!!). I was not into booze for ages, and may be I need a few shots and some cover songs to finally seal another chapter in my breakup diary.  I was a-okay, but living healthy and somewhat sane also requires ample justification before splurging on Tequila and Vodka.

Mental notes:

  1.  Just like a lovely, drunken heroine in a romantic comedy movie (ehem, blog ko ‘to okay), I tried to dig for some deep-seated emotions that made me purposely break my heart a little, or may be cracked it a little bit.  It was weird to go through a heart-breaking experience without having to cry…not yabang though, it is just weird for I used to be a cry baby.  Back in Manila, I tried making myself cry while driving (for months!), it did not work…I tried to cry myself to sleep, but the floods of dopamine won’t let me…until the  healing process was completed.  I tried to cry in solitude, concealed by the sacred walls of my sanctuary.  It did not work, too.  Weird ba ko or tough?
  2. I was trying to internalize the drama in the music video “Nothing” by the Script – the drinking version.  There’s no way I can match the drama in that video…I so love the song + video pa naman.  Screw all the tears!  It won’t come out whatever I do.  Again…weird ba ko or matigas na ko ngayon or maturity na tawag dito?
  3. I was on Tequila glass #5, and I can still think clearly.  I was waiting for my hands to get a little numb, but it was not happening…so I drank some more.  Love it!  =)  Ian scored some funky, groovy music, and people started to rock the dance floor…and I was one with the beautiful crowd.  There was no reckless abandon that happened.  For one, I had my good friend Charlaine to watch over me…and besides, I tried to drink as many, but the alcohol can’t get the better of me.  Ganito na ba ko naging ‘addict sa life’ pati alcohol hindi na tumama?  Hindi na nga ako iyakin, hindi pa din ako malasing…growing up ba ang tawag dito, or weird lang talaga ako, o baka sobrang dense?
  4. I met some interesting people, too.  The golden ‘girls’ of Norway sure know how to party. Sabi nga naming ni Charlaine, we could see our future selves right in front of us.  I stopped asking myself why I was not crying or moved to tears…nag-enjoy na lang ako…hehehe…life is short.  =)  It was good to feel some effects of the alcohol and at the same time, I was still in control of myself – all clean fun…perfect concoction – people, music, ambiance, and the ever hot-hot Tequila.

astoria at night. i fell in love with the place.

Morning after, hotel phone was ringing and it was a call from a guy I met at the bar.  Sadly, he is not Irish…sobrang malayo kay Danny O’Donoghue of  The Script. I even recited the caller’s   and his friends’ names and their ‘pamatay’ na lines in sequence, just to prove that I was not drunk the night before.  O kita mo na, pare, sabi sa’yo at 2AM, hindi pa din ako lasing. Suko ata sila, at 2AM bumabangka pa kami ni Charlaine sa kwento.

I intended to drink again that Saturday night…but while the Saturday morning sun was up, Charlaine and I joined the bee-line to what would be an adventure in paradise – Parasailing!  =)

Now, here’s the video of the song, which I can’t seem to get enough of.  

When running is bliss


 SS told me, “Watch your feet.  You never know where they’ll take you.” 

 I am forever grateful for that thought.  Whether it is between my feet and the pavement, or all-weather-all-terrain, it is never too soon to stop running.

 And when you think you can run fast?  Kinda’ get hold of the thought until you run in the mountains.  =)

 I paced quite moderately until I tried to ‘feel’ the hills of Baguio.   It was in Baguio where my lungs were beaten.  What used to be an efficient pair of lungs almost ran out of air even before my feet reached the 300meter mark.  It can only be the effect of high altitude and thin air.

 At 300 meters, I was watching my feet and listening to my body, trying not to make it obvious that I was literally gasping for air…Back at 200 meters, I was female runner #2…and at 300meters, now you decide, Ann do you want to make this harder, or let it slide, cut yourself some slack and enjoy the race?  I chose the latter.  I let go.  I stopped watching my feet.  I stopped glancing at my watch.  I started to enjoy the view and the climate – it was so serene.  I was not counting strides.  I was counting blessings, instead.  I’m a recreational runner.  I’m keeping it at that.  Halfway to the finish line, it was all downhill…I was even happier, only if I could roll down the hills injury-free just like they do in cartoons; I would have done just the same in a heartbeat.  

 The technical side of the race did not really matter to me as I was too happy in the ‘meowth zone’ over a few ‘very-first-times’ that could only happen in Baguio Feel the Hill run challenge (10 April 2011). 

            My first:       

  1. Out-of-town run with the SM Runners (with beautiful families and fabulous friends in tow)
  2. Uphill training for my (first) full marathon – Couldn’t have it any other way…
  3. To run in one of my favorite cities –Baguio!  With matching photo shoot with the locals
  4. Podium finish – Rank # 4 – 5KM Female Div – I did not expect that the organizers would award Rank 1 – 10.  
  5. Stay at the SM Vacation Homes – log cabin galore – love, love, love!
  6. Race Director Mr. Philip Pacle – was first to congratulate me at the finish line.

 Good thing that most of us (SM Runners) signed up for 5KM, considering that it was our first uphill run.  It may be relatively shorter in terms of distance, but it was the toughest course I’ve ever negotiated so far…and I enjoyed every second of it.  I think I’m going back for more!  =)

 Next road + trail run:  Mizuno at Tagaytay Highlands (15KM) with my favorite pack, the SM Runners.   =)

The road to my first full marathon: Starting over again =)

I used to have an on-and-off love affair with running.  I started running as a form of recreation back in 2009.  I was  full of energy that I was the one who would convene the running enthusiasts in the head office, soliciting support from top management, and would later refer to the group as the – SM Runners.

In 2010, my passion for running and badminton had to take the back seat in favor of a venture, which spelled of failure from its very inception.  While I was at it, I was becoming a different person that  no one else would have recognized if nothing was done to break the bad spell.  I have remained tough on the surface – this is my trademark…but I was hurting deeply to the core.  I think it was not pain, but anguish would be a more appropriate term for it.

Maturity has its way of strengthening one’s resolve…and sometimes it is best to just break away for sanity’s sake – no use in winning a battle if it would entail emerging as a loser in the war…In January 2011, I was back on my feet again – literally and figuratively. Since day 1, I was pacing myself quite well than I ever did in the past.  I was alone, running, but I never felt I was running all by myself. I could not help but to count my blessings. I reached the ‘meowth’ zone after what felt like forever.  I knew I was at peace with myself again. It was all good and empowering.

I am always surrounded by well-meaning people – family, friends, and colleagues…but the road to recovery is about finding and rebuilding one’s self again – you have to administer your own rescue (think Eat, Pray, Love).  I thought Prada and LV can help me administer a fabulous rescue…but it was running that did it for me…

One important lesson that running ingrained on me happens to be one of life’s greater metaphors – when you run, you keep moving forward, onward…conventionally, no one would dare to run backwards in a race…same thing when pacing along life’s crazy race route, the best choice is to always move forward no matter what…even when you’re hurting, you just walk until you can run again.

I wake up early on Sundays.  So excited to run.  It’s one of His venue for making me slow down (while I pace, physically) in order to realize some important things about life, even those borne out of simple encounters.

I want to share the positivity, which can be drawn from running. I’m now assisting fellow runners as the coordinator of the SM Runners.  I’m honored to be given that warm welcome by the core group – as one member said, ‘the original PAAdikANN is back!’

Zhe shi haoshi huilai!  This is for the long run!  =)

 

starting over again with my fave brand of running shoes